The best thing.

im sry, im sry, im sry, im sry, im soo sry.. seriously.. I've lost my writing ability again! I dunno.. it's like I dont have anything to write anymore.. my life is good for once so I dont need a place to let my feelings out.. XD höhö höhö.. well the funny thing is that it's fucking true ^^ I rly like my life for once like.. lols..
Anyways.. been upto ALOT since last time I wrote, since it was like ages ago n ofc it happens alot of things thn.. well well, first of all this bout Joakim coming here.. wasnt that gd.. it was perfectly planned until we got to the point where he couldnt come!.. fucking shit.. seriously you know how MUCH I'd been longing for him to come here like! it was like I could jus go n fucking shoot myself.. since I had nothing more to live for, my life was ruined... until that day whn Andreas saved my life.. <3 I came up with the great idea that I could go to Joakim..! So I talked to mum but she wouldnt let me go.. n so Andreas told me that HE could come! N so I could go :D n I was so fucking happy! an entire week at Joakims .. <3 What more could I long for........... well....... nothing ^^
Anyways.. the days went on n I was the luckiest girl ever.. until... I went to Andreas one day n was gon hang out n do like nohing.. n so he resieves an txt from this girl he's s'pose to stay with whn we went down.. n apperently she was gon go away for the weekend!!!! FUCKING CRAP! No1.. serisouly, NO ONE!, can understand how fucking ruined I was... If it felt bad whn Joakim couldnt come here.. this was NOTHING compare to that.. it was like hell went loose.. I jus got in a very bad mood n finally I jus had to go home since I couldnt handle it all.. n whn I came home it jus burst .. I couldnt stop crying.. I cried n cried for like hours.. I couldnt sleep bcs I couldnt stop crying.. I couldnt stop thinking bout how much god must hate me! I was so hurt n sad n angry n everything at the same time!.. Oh god, there's no word in the entire world that could describe it..
I went to a doctor nxt day, to look up my knee, since there's apperently sumthing wrong with it, n so I went to school.. totally despressed.. had a physics test n like.. yeah, lived my depressing life as it was.. until mum wrote me an txt telling me that she couldnt manage to see me this down n depressed.. n that she was gon talk to dad bout this n convince him to let me go...
So.. 23/10 was the best day ever.. mum n dad had been talking n so they ordered tickets for me to Guthenborg from 27/10 - 03/11 <3<3 There's no word in the world, either, that could describe that happiness like... it was the best thing ever.. <3

So the 27th I took the bus to Vännäs and took the train from there to Guthenborg.. and at 8 the following day.. I got my first hug ever from Joakim... <3

"I had the time of my life, and I owe it all to you..." is the song right.. and hunny, it's so true.. <3

I miss you alrdy <'3

*whispers* I love you....

Solitude* Vacancy <3

Postat av: Jhonny


2007-11-05 @ 23:30:57

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